Exam, Wedding, Easter Concert!

 4 March - 31 March 2024

It's a quarter of the way through the year, and I've already accomplished two of my goals set for this year, so I am feeling on track. I finally got notified that I was eligible to get monetized on YouTube! So I jumped through the last few hoops and made it. But I really don't get enough views, so I doubt I'll be making much at all, and it may turn away some viewers if there are ads (I'm definitely guilty of switching out of a video if an ad starts that I can't skip), but oh well. I'll just keep focusing on content creation and making it something I'm proud of and find fulfilling and not worry about the money aspect. The second goal I have for this year is to pass the MFT National Licensing Exam, which I took about two weeks ago on March 16th. I haven't received my score back yet, it can take another week or so, but I feel very confident about it, so I'm safely assuming I've passed until I know otherwise. Then the following weekend was Valerie's wedding, so I took off work on Friday and helped my mom all day with stuff, then on Saturday, I got ready by 9am and went and helped finish up Val's makeup, then went with her to the temple to help her get ready, then attended the sealing and watched the tender expressions on her face, Porter's face, and even my dad's face! His eyes looked very soft and a bit red around them, and it was very touching. I was kind of not feeling the best and didn't want to cry too much, but I did get watery eyes. Then I helped Val put on her wedding gown after and we took photos, and I stayed longer to follow her and Porter and the photographer around to get some more photos. Then I got home that afternoon and took a short power nap then got up to finish helping set up for the reception. I helped put up the luminaries (and then took them down later that evening). I also helped decorate Val's car and Bryce bought stuff to help make the inside of it look cool. The food at the reception was amazing, and people loved that there was a separate gluten-free table with food. And of course the icecream man was a hit! DJ Ron did a great job and we had a great time dancing. I had to force myself to because I was tired and my belly was full, but it was super fun and I was actually pleasantly surprised by how quickly I was picking up on some of the line dances! Then we sent off the couple and then had to clean up. We finished getting the most important stuff done by 10pm, which is when it started to rain. Lucy and I were driving the ranger back home after getting the last of the luminaries, so we got a bit pelted, but it was okay. I was so exhausted though, and my feet ached for days. I joked with mom and said I ain't having a wedding any time soon cuz that was too much work, and Kayla said, "That's why you elope!" Sunday and Monday night were the performances for the YSA Easter concert that I was part of, and both went very well. I had a lot of people come to support me! On Sunday night, Hanna and Cindy from the gym, plus their husbands, came to support me! Plus my mission president came! And Becca Carrol, who even brought me a flower, which was so sweet! My grandparents came, plus my parents and Aaron and Briesa and Val and Porter. On Monday night, my boss from KM Signs, Kelly, came. They all mentioned how it was more incredible than they imagined and they loved it! The other big highlight of this month was my doctor's appointment. I'd gotten my blood drawn and got the results back... first, I finally found out my blood type! I'm A-positive, which now makes my whole life make sense... no wonder I was always feeling the pressure to get A+ on all my exams! ;). Also, my hormones were imbalanced, which has been the cause of me having anemia in the past and lots of emotional ups and downs and painful periods. I'm now on a supplement that should help get me to healthier levels, plus I'm avoiding plastics (I never knew it was such a big deal [in a bad way] to microwave food in plastic dishes, etc., but apparently that can cause hormonal imbalances). So I'm feeling very hopeful that I'm going to start feeling better in four more weeks. Oh, I also filmed a funny YouTube short that was a re-enactment of something that happened in session with a teen client of mine. Since then, I had another funny thing happen with a teen, and I think I want to make all of them that happen into YouTube shorts. Well, that pretty much sums up the month of March! Ups and downs, but overall, I'm hanging in there and am just going to keep trudging forward.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Poor gracey-pants got attacked by our rooster... so our rooster is now bye-bye.

Sunday Selfie time!

One of Val's last nights as a single woman... spent playing Ticket To Ride with the 'rents!

Wedding Pics Time!!

Flower from Bex! (Rebekah Carroll)

Korean 한국 BBQ & Bridal Shower

 29 January - 3 March 2024

I meant to write last Sunday, but it was a hectic day, so here I am with SO much to report, and SO many pictures to share! Because a lot has happened over the last month. So be prepared! Okay, let's start off with some epic highlights. I had a marvelous birthday! My bosses at KM Signs took me out the day before my birthday for lunch at Costa Vida! On my birthday, I had a lot of people message me and I got a gift from work at CLEAR Counseling, which was unexpected and very sweet! Then my parents took me out for Korean BBQ, which was an experience I really wanted to have after watching so many kdramas! I got to try some foods that I've only seen on screen, and while I can't say I loved the food/found a new favorite food, I had an incredibly fun experience. It made me so so happy. And Val got me a "Blessed and Kdrama Obsessed" t-shirt which tickled me pink, haha. Very accurate ;). And the card she got me wished me a happy birthday in Korean!! Hmm, let's see. Then that weekend, Valerie threw a murder mystery dinner party for Porter, so I dressed up in my new snazzy outfit. I also updated my wardrobe a bit, so I have some suit coats (again... like a lot of women I see in kdramas... LOLs). I also got everything prepped and ready for Val's bridal shower. People seemed to really enjoy the games, so I was very happy about that. I attended a wedding of a couple in our ward and went to McKenna Breinholt's watch party for American Idol. I also made a video about that for my YouTube channel... I'm really trying to get those last few watch hours I need to get monetized. That's one huge goal I hope to meet this year, and I'm super close. My other huge goal for this year is to pass my licensure exam, which I take two weeks from now! I'm looking forward to getting that done and over with. I've put in almost 30 study hours so far and hope to get another 20 hours in, and then I'm going to take and PASS the darn thing, and that will be a huge accomplishment and weight off my shoulder! Hmm, let's see. I am continuing with my skincare routine, but for some reason I had a terrible breakout around my chin that lasted all month and gets worse, so I went to the doctor and will get bloodwork done to check my hormones, because a breakout there is a sign of potential hormone imbalance. I am very happy with my foundation I've been using, Missha, it really applies onto my skin well and gives me a nice glow. Even my mom loves it and has gotten compliments. My clientele has built up a lot this past month. I'm practically at capacity, which is great, because then after my exam, I will open up more spots of availability, and I'll have more time to play around with the idea of doing groups or something. And writing my stories, which I haven't really done in the last year, but it is a goal for this year, which has been put on hold until after I pass my exam. And since that is coming up so soon, I'm really excited because I feel like I will have more time to do other things I've put "on hold" for so long! I am also continuing to go to the gym with my mom every weekday, and we finally got a photo of our Korean workout squad! Okay, so only Hanna is Korean. The rest of us are not. But we count to ten in Korean as we do our leg exercises! And I got the best compliment ever from Hanna! She said that while counting, she kept thinking there was a native Korean next to her counting... that's how good my pronunciation has gotten! (At least with the numbers 1 through 10, lol). Val's wedding is coming up in 3 weeks, and we are excited for her to begin married life, and mom is a bit sad to be losing her daughter. Wedding prep is coming along great tho. I've learned a lot about my personality this past month and feel that I have grown as a person. I've been able to buckle down and study for hours each Tuesday and Thursday for my exam, and I've learned more about my personality type from some of the videos I watched, as well as I've become more mindful and relaxed. We start each study session with doing mindfulness, and I've found myself reaching for that skill often throughout my day to keep me grounded and focused and happy. I've also been able to make more sense of the theories now that I'm studying them all again with over a year of clinical practice under my belt. They make a lot more sense now that I have real people and situations I can see them applying to. I think my skills as a clinician are growing too with all the studying, training, and practice I put in. What's incredible is to look back at how much I was struggling a few months ago and finally be out on the other side of that. Yes, there are times I still feel like I don't know what I'm doing or question my abilities, but the fact of the matter is that I'm trying my best, AND that people are wanting to come see me. AND I've finally had some breakthroughs with clients that have been absolutely incredible. Like, after 5 months of working with this one client, she finally started applying things and had noticed a huge difference in her life, reaching most of the goals we had set. It has been incredible to see the changes in her, seeing her more expressive and grounded and aware and confident. I've had clients "graduate" or finish therapy. And I have a growing clientele with clients who keep coming back, when sometimes I don't even know why. So, those help me to recognize that I do have something of value that I am offering. Additionally, getting supervision and support from other clinicians has been really beneficial. Okay, well the next time you hear from me, I'll let you know how my exam went and how the wedding was!

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Felt cute

I tried baby octopus and shrimp

I also tried Kimchi stew and steamed egg!

Feeling cute at the wedding reception

Zoey and me chilling at the watch party

Me driving home from church today

Me, Mom, Hanna, and Cindy. #HanaDulSetNet

Surprise Birthday Success!

 8 January 2024 - 28 January 2024

Hello, my friends! After graduating, my next step has been to recover from feeling absolutely burnt out! So, one of my new mottos has become not to do anything I don't have to do. And even so, I've still been doing some things I don't technically "have to" do, such as continuing to work on and build up my YouTube channel and learning Korean, but I've allowed myself not to feel guilt for "doing nothing" or "unproductive" things. Well, as part of this motto, I've decided to change from writing weekly to monthly, just recapping the highlights at the end of each month to simplify things. And as time goes on, if I feel like writing more, I will, but for now, this will be a good change of pace. Coming up next is... I'm finishing up working at the sign shop this next week and then will quit and begin studying for my exam, which I booked for March 16th. I'll keep taking off those two days each week to put in some solid study hours and prep for the exam. I'm confident that once I buckle down and go through the study program, I will be just fine and will pass the exam. I did so well on the GRE, and have a history of doing well on exams, so it will go smoothly; I just have to put in the hours, which I will in February and the beginning of March. Then, after I take the exam, I will reassess where I'm at with clients and see if I need to pick up a second site to get more clients so I can make a liveable wage and also get more client hours to count towards full licensure. Until then, I'm not going to worry about not having a lot of clients or making much money. So, in theory, I have a pretty balanced schedule for these next few months. The main thing I am working on is my confidence in sessions because for whatever reason, I become very uncertain when working with the parents of children, and I need to express more confidence in myself and what I am doing, because my work truly is valuable, so I don't know why I act like it isn't. So, this past month, we had some fun FHE activities. We had an info-mercial contest of random retro objects, such as spam, aprons, a sewing machine, garbage bags, etc. and it was SO funny! It was a great time. I also started attending the live Zoom reviews that Diane Gehart holds once a month for the MFT exam. I went to my friend Jessy's bridal shower, which had really good food and a cute flower-crown-making station. I also had breakfast at the gluten-free bakery with my friend Abby who got back from a semester in Washington DC, which was super fun! I also had a Korean night with my two friends Therese and Courtlynn. Zoey came too, and we went to the Asian market and bought snacks, then went back to their apartment and watched the first episode of Goblin. I have started attending stake choir practice for the upcoming easter performance, and we have some super awesome songs we are learning! I've already invited lots of coworkers and friends to come to it! I spent a week being sick, so that made me slow down even more and take better care of myself. I decided to apply for FSY this summer! It'll likely be the last summer I can do it, so I wanted to give it a shot, plus I'd love to be able to travel to cool places and meet lots of cool and fun people! I've been working on my own mental health and expectations about counseling and the role of my own spirituality in my work, and I have discovered how much I love intertwining God's gospel into every aspect of my life, so spending almost a year trying to "separate" that from my therapy work was harmful to my mental/emotional health, and I'm now starting to integrate those two sides of myself. I had a very helpful discussion with my supervisor Michele and with another LDS therapist, Jonathan. I officially got released from my stake calling, which was a huge relief, because I was feeling so overwhelmed having that on top of being called to help Elder Anderson fulfill his assignment given by the prophet and apostles to plan and hold a YSA AZ Regional Conference. Plus I still have a ward calling as being on the FHE planning committee. My mom threw our grandpa a surprise birthday party, Hawaiian Luau themed, and Amanda and Matthew even flew down for it, so it was the first time in a couple of years that all five of his children were together! We tricked him and told him the set-up was for a YSA activity, and then when all the family showed up, we hid and got him outside and jumped out and surprised him. He did not even really know how to respond. He was shocked to see everyone. We played some games and ate delicious food! Everyone had a great time. I have a lot of new clients coming my way, mostly kids, so I am brushing up and deepening my knowledge of play therapy and working with kids! Well, those are the highlights so far... catch ya next month!

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Jessy Gavin's Bridal Shower

Me taking a selfie at the Asian store in front of the Korean restaurants!

Grandpa's Surprise Party:

Door to 2024!

26 December 2023 - 7 January 2024

Okay, yes, I may have decided to make every new year post rhyme. Just wanted to keep with the tradition from last year ;).  

If you've been following along in the last several posts, you may have picked up on a theme of feeling overwhelmed and anxious and pressured. Well, I've been delving into my own mental health and self-care, studying closely with God to figure some faulty mindsets I'd picked up along the way, and it's been a whole thing, which is why finding the energy and motivation to write in my blog was pretty much non-existant last week, but I'm here now, so that counts for something. It's now been a whole week into the new year, and I do feel a lot better--more hopeful, less anxious. It's been an interesting journey to reflect back over this past year and realize that in many areas in my professional life, I've felt like I've had to hold myself back in regard to my religious expression, often feeling like my own religiosity would create bias or judgment or would be unethical, so I had to hold myself back. Slowly, I think it started to tear me up a little inside because I used to eat, breathe, sleep all things spiritual and religious. In the books I read, listened to, in the music I listened to, in my thoughts, in my school studies, in my hobbies. And I've felt a thirst and hunger recently to go back to that girl who was immersed in all things religion, no matter what she was doing. I would listen to religious books while working custodial, we could relate any subject at BYU to the gospel. I never felt like I had to separate or compartmentalize my religious side, until going through my Master's program and hearing opinions and teachings from secular teachers. But I've realized that creates a lot more strain in me because I feel like I am working from secular models based on my own expertise and abilities, which creates a lot of pressure, insecurity, and feelings of imposter syndrome. I'd rather work from an integrated religious perspective where all my therapy work/models/interventions are used from the foundation of Christ and His spiritual power and guidance. I don't want to feel like I have to separate my thoughts from Him when studying or practicing therapy. I want to be able to invite Him into my therapy room, into my treatment planning, and invite my clients into my scripture study. Of course on the outside, nothing huge changes. I'm still not preaching gospel principles. I think maybe I would be less hesitant to draw on religious analogies if I know they are religious. But if they are not, I would still respect that and not bring up religious topics when they want to focus on other things. But on the inside, things will change because I will be relying on the power of Jesus Christ to help guide me to know what to say and do to help my clients, and His power and Spirit will be in the room. I hope that my therapy room becomes a sacred space where you can feel a palpable spirit of peace, love, and upliftment. Yeah, so that's been on my mind a lot, just thinking how to better integrate religion and spiritualness into my therapy and into my YouTube channel and other hobbies. Speaking of hobbies, I am still hooked on Kdramas and attempting to learn Korean. Even though my progress may be considered rather slow, I am making tangible, palpable improvements, and that is so very exciting! It's easier for me to sound out Korean words and I can read them a little bit faster. I started working on memorizing 3 Nephi 5:13 in Korean! 

Okay, so now onto some highlights from the past two weeks:

During the last week of December, I finished up my application for my associate license and got that submitted within the first week of January, once I'd officially graduated. I sent over my official transcripts, so now I'm just waiting to hear back from them regarding scheduling to take the licensure examination. Everything is so expensive! I will really need to save up my money because applying for licensure, taking exams, and all these CE credits and EFT trainings will cost me about 2 grand when all is said and done! It's insane. No wonder therapy is expensive, y'all! Being a therapist is expensive!

Valerie took me to get my graduation photos, and even though I didn't feel cute that day for whatever reason, fortunately, a lot of the pictures turned out very cute. I don't know exactly why I was just feeling perfectionistic and nit-picky that day. It was a mood. But I've been very motivated to eat a lot healthier, and surprisingly, my desire for carbs and sugar has declined. I just really want to flood my body with healthy things! So I've been drinking healthy smoothies for breakfast with pea-protein powder and fruits/veggies. And then I'm trying to eat a lot more healthier meals, like salmon, quinoa, vegetables, and oranges. I'm avoiding any unnecessary carbs or sugar. But I'm not too picky about it to where I deprive myself of anything. But it's been amazing to see the amount of what I eat decrease as well, as my desire decreases to overindulge in chips and other things that aren't the best for me. On Wednesday the 27th, I had dinner with a friend I met from the EFT training, Ashley. It was incredible and so needed! We talked for two hours at the place! It was such a needed space to be able to share about clients, progress, insecurities, worries, and life as an intern in general and to be understood and validated. I really hope our friendship continues to deepen! 

It's been nice thinking that I'm actually getting paid for what I'm doing now! I am also carrying on with my YouTube channel, though it is still not getting many views and feels pointless at times. But I want to continue to turn it into something meaningful and useful. I think I changed it into a good direction when I started focusing in on activities for teens and children, and I'll stick with that direction for a little longer as I continue to ponder and explore how to make it more meaningful and fulfilling. Along the lines of what I was saying earlier, I'm thinking I need to incorporate religious teachings and references into each video, inviting the Spirit and having invitations to act, but I'm still trying to figure out just how I want to incorporate that. I went to Skate Land yesterday with Val for a girl's party. She's in our ward and friends with us both. It was fun to go and stake, but it sure has been a while! I think it took my an hour to ease myself into it and not feel so anxious (last time I rollerbladed at a YSA activity, I fell and really hurt my knee, so I think my elevated race had more to do with nerves than the exercise). But it slowly calmed down and I gained more confidence and had a blast. Plus got a good workout. Also, I've been continuing to go to the gym with my mom, and I am still loving the friend group I made there with Cindy and Hana. I really feel my legs and gluts getting stronger! I've also played pickleball with Andrew, Lu, and Val and had a lot of fun. So yeah, that pretty much sums up my life right now!

Me and Lu before heading to the New Year's YSA dance:

Me still obsessed with the Alchemy of Souls soundtrack/drama, listening at work:

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Merry Christmas!

 18 December - 25 December 2023

Some highlights from the past week include... playing pickleball with Andrew, Valerie, and Porter after FHE! FHE was a white elephant gift exchange, and I got a giant pack of ramen noodles, which I regifted (along with the pooping dog calendar) to my brother Sean, who seemed to like the gifts! Saturday morning, I had a great time in the temple morning because I got to be sealed in behalf of two Korean girls to their parents, and then one of the ladys in the room was also an MFT, so we talked for a bit after, then I got to see Val and Porter in the celestial room! Saturday afternoon, I went to As You Wish Pottery with Valerie, Lucy, and Porter. Us girls made cute little tea cups, but I'll have to upload the pictures next week because they'll be ready for pick up sometime this week. Christmas eve dinner was delicious! We had tamales, chili, and nachos! Christmas day, Valerie officially got engaged to Porter! We had our Christmas lunch with three sets of missionaries and played the "sounds" game. The morning was really relaxing because we got to sleep in, then watch the Christ child and eat a yummy breakfast! I have been eating too much junk food and sugar lately, but I enjoyed it while it lasted, and now I'm on to a healthier diet. Some of my highlights of the past week were sitting in my room on my cozy chair, wrapped in a blanket, eating yummy treats, while watching a Kdrama! I am continuing to slowly and surely study the Korean language. Also, I joined a little exercise group at the gym consisting of Cindy and Hana. Hana is from Korea but moved here 25 years ago. Cindy is a temple worker, so it's fun to see her at both places. We work out our leg muscles, and I've been getting super sore from it, which is a good thing I guess. Lucy has also been super excited to see Gracelyn! She sure missed that little thing while she was away at college! 

On our way to As You Wish Pottery.

Christmas Eve selfies with the Dad

Plus the Lu

And Seany Sean Sean

We played a Jack Box game that was pretty funny!

I'm excited to dig into my new Christmas presents to further my studies in Korean!

Mom went on a shopping spree for clothes for the babe. She looks French in that hat!! Haha, she is sooo cute! We all adore her.

Much love,

Emily Burnham