Letters to Inmates

 24 August - 30 August 2020

And just like that, school is just around the corner. I'm back in Provo, no longer melting in the 113 degree AZ heat. But I really miss my family. I know it'll be okay; it just takes time to adjust to a new schedule, but I am really excited about going back to school. I love learning! And I have some pretty neat classes lined up for this Fall semester. I'm taking Meditation, Basic Mediation, Abnormal Psychology, and Positive Psychology. I am also completing my capstone, so I get to TA for Professor Wood's in-person class. That'll be super cool!

Monday: Oh, mom made the most delicious hamburgers, and I got to eat TWO of them! Man, smoked burgers are the BOMB diggity. Mmhh, I think my mouth is watering just thinking about them.

Tuesday: Mom took me to the DI and we looked around and clothes and kitchen stuff. Mom bought this huge serving tray, and just as we were leaving, she accidentally dropped and it broke a bit. We also spent some time crafting because I wanted to make something for the Nixon family that I used to babysit for. I miss all their cute little kiddos. My genius mother had a great idea of making them these Thanksgiving blocks of wood that say "Give Thanks" and they turned out SO cute. I also made a banner for my friend Whitney since we had lots of paper. I asked my mom if we could pretty-please have pizza on my last night, and boy oh boy, it was SO good. Much better than the pizza from last Saturday. Apparently, it was so good that Sean even ate most of my left overs the next day (insert bawling emoji here).

Wednesday: It was nice have a later flight because I had plenty of time to wash the bedding and clean up the place before leaving. Since I didn't have a very big lunch (thanks, Sean, for eating my pizza...), my kind mother made sure to feed me before dropping me off at the air port that afternoon. I kid you not--I gained at least three pounds in that week and a half of being home and fed so well. Let's see how soon I lose it once I go back to feeding myself... hehe. My friend Whitney picked me up from the airport and helped me unload some of my stuff. Then we went over to her apartment and went swimming for a bit.

Thursday: Whitney came over in the morning to help me finish unpacking my stuff from my car. I put my room back into order, did some laundry, worked for three hours online. I also met my new roommates, Summer and Mattie. I already know my third roommate Mira. She was living across from us and is already in the ward, but just moved over. They are very sweet, both fresh out of high school. That evening, I had a date with a guy I'd met on mutual. I did not enjoy it. But oh well. At least I know how to carry on a conversation and be kind. Afterwards, I attended a friend group movie night in Lehi. It was someone in the group's birthday, and I got him play-doe, cuz why not? And some candy, so it wasn't completely terrible. We watched Kung Fu Panda! Wow, I really wish I was a ninja and had cool moves. 

Friday: I worked some more today. I had to put in a bunch of due dates for when assignments will be due for the Psych 381 course I'm TAing for. I have also been reading a lot of books lately. Can you blame me? I won't have much time once school starts! I also discovered like I really like red cabbage (though it looks purple to me).

Saturday: There was a ward breakfast out in the parking lot in the morning. None of my roommates were awake yet, so I went alone and got to meet lots of new people. I spent the majority of the rest of my day prepping for classes, which start this coming week, and working to make sure the course I'm TAing for is complete. Then I wanted to watch Inside Out, and I definitely cried at the end. I just appreciate so much the way they depict the role and importance of sadness in our lives. We're not always going to be happy, and not only is that okay, but it's also good. Sadness allows us to connect with others in a way few other things can.

Sunday: Because of Covid19, our ward is split and goes to church in two different time blocks. We had the 11am slot, and it was nice sitting with my three new roommates. I really like them all. After church, I wrote three letters to inmates as a volunteer for Fresh Start Ventures, and I really enjoyed being able to share spiritual and sacred experiences anonymously that will hopefully inspire and uplift them. I was able to testify about hope, repentance, and Heavenly Father's love for His children.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Aaron the Cutie

 17 August - 23 August 2020

Monday: I felt a bit sick today, so I kept to myself. I watched a movie and did some work (reviewing tests for my online TA job). I also started reading a new series called The Cruel Prince.

Tuesday: My mom set up a dentist appointment for me in the morning, so I went to get my teeth cleaned. No cavities! I also did Lucy's hair and painted her toe nails. Also, my mom lined us up by height and snapped a picture. Lucy is so close to me in height!

Wednesday: I got ready quick as lightening this morning and went with Sean and my mom to get my hair cut. I got my GRE scores back and I did good! No need to retake it. Now I just have to send in applications to grad schools. That evening, my mom wanted to watch an old movie, so we watched Swiss Family Robinson. It was so good! 

Thursday: Grandpa came over in the morning and saw a package of rice paper that we make spring rolls with. He thought they were tortillas and picked them up, slamming them down hard on the table and said, "These stack well." Well, later in the day, my mom opens a package to make spring rolls and the rice paper is cracked up. She was so sad, thinking they came that way. Then I told her grandpa hit them on the counter and she was so mad at him, but didn't want him to know because then he would feel bad. So then we came up with a plan for revenge... I went over to his house and stole his container of peanut butter cookies. Our plan was for him to see they were missing, wonder where they went, and then see them when he came over. But then he wasn't home all day, so we thought he went to the cabin and I put the cookies back. But he was just out visiting someone. So the joke was on us. This weekend, I also watched Infinity War and End Game for the first time (and yes, I cried at the ending).

Friday: Our neighbor Lana came over to visit, and Val was finally able to give her the chicken explosion box she spent so many hours making. In the late afternoon, Aaron and I went to take some nice pictures of him at a park by our grandma's house. He wanted to try and replicate his senior pictures, so we kept wandering around in the 100 degree weather, searching for the right locations. I did snap some Emily-original pics though ;). It took us almost two and a half hours total! The best part was that at the end, I told him to sit down on a rock by some cacti, and he totally sat right on a cactus and got a bunch of thorns in his butt!! Haha, then I had to help pick them off. When we got home, mom and dad took the car for their date night, so Aaron and I convinced Grandpa Jim to drive us to Inn and Out by telling him he could get a chocolate shake! Aaron paid for my dinner as a thanks for doing the photo shoot. 

Saturday: I drove to my old friend Becky Nebeker Carroll's house to meet up for lunch. I got to meet her dog and husband. Then as we were walking to the car, she tripped off the sidewalk and broke her sandal! We went to Zupas for lunch. It was fun to catch up and hear about how publishing her book is going. When I got back home, I got to visit a bit with my Aunt Symantha. That evening, we went swimming at the Lebaron's house and then smoked some pizzas. I ate the whole thing! It was fun, if not a bit chaotic since there was a bunch of kiddos there.

Sunday: I got to lead the Come, Follow Me discussion this morning. What was really cool was that we had our nonmember neighbor Amir join us. He even participated in the discussion! I could tell he felt the Spirit. He's taking the missionary discussions in our home, which is super cool. I enjoyed having the opportunity to testify of Jesus Christ.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

GRE and Goodbyes

 10 August - 16 August 2020

Howdy friends and family. What a week.

Monday

I picked up my friend Becca and we went ice skating. I got to show her some of the things I've been learning, though at one point I did take a fall and bruised up my knee... I have also been drinking lots of herbal tea because I'm afraid I'm starting to not feel super well. I've pretty much had a constant headache and have felt super thirsty no matter how much water I drink for the past few days.

Tuesday

I studied a bit during the day, and then drove Becca and her husband Peter to Alyssa's wedding reception. She was a former companion of both of us. On the way there, Becca was kind enough to quiz me on vocabulary words. We got to see a couple of people from our mission at the reception, and they had dairy and gluten-free pies/cheesecakes! I love Alyssa's family :). We drove home with enough time for me to head to bed and get enough sleep before taking the GRE.

Wednesday

Wow, I only really felt nervous this morning! I hadn't felt nervous all week, which was a huge miracle so that I could enjoy my time doing other fun activities. But I'm so glad I signed up to take my exam in the morning so I could get it over with first thing. I had reserved a room on the first floor of the library and put up sticky notes around to tell people to be quiet because I was taking the GRE. It worked well for the most part. I could occasionally hear someone faintly singing but it didn't detract much from the test. The first math section was harder than I anticipated, but the rest of the exam went pretty much as expected, and the score I received reflected the scores I'd gotten previously on the practice exams, save a few points lower in the math and a few points higher in the verbal. I also feel confident about the writing section, though I won't get my scores back from that for a couple weeks. Afterwards, I took myself out to lunch at Costa Vida to celebrate. I had a doctor's appointment that afternoon. In order to relax that evening, I water colored another figure skating image.

Thursday

I took it really easy today. I had to start moving things out of my bedroom because the management is having the walls and carpet in the bedrooms redone. I decided to go home during the two week break between semesters so I don't have to be there while all that is happening. I also watched Ant Man for the first time! I am so not a fan of movies with cussing and bad language!! And lots of violence. And stealing. So basically, I didn't really love the movie. 

Friday

I finished cleaning out my room, and I was able to fit most of my stuff in my car! Then I worked for an hour and dropped off a present for Matt's birthday with Whitney and a bunch of other friends. I stayed for a bit but then went home to finish packing and cleaning. I finished around 10pm but then decided that I didn't want to go to bed because maybe if I stayed up late then I could sleep on the plane the next morning. So I watched another movie.

Saturday

Whitney picked me up in the morning and drove me to the airport. She was in her PJs. She gave me a hug goodbye. Well, I didn't sleep on the plane ride home, but I sat next to a cool girl and we just talked the whole way. She was AMAZING at just asking question after question to get to know me. And I only felt a little bit sick when the plane descended and landed. The girl even gave me some gluten-free beef jerky. So kind! Mom picked me up and took me shopping, then we went home. Of course, Lucy gave me a huge hug, followed by other family members. I played my first game of chess after Lucy taught me the rules, and I actually beat her! But she has improved a lot since then. I did Lucy's toes and hair before going to bed.

Sunday

Unfortunately, I just wasn't feeling all that great when I woke up so I didn't want to go to church and risk getting anyone else sick. I slept in, then did Lucy's makeup and ate breakfast, then went back to bed. We were able to have the sacrament and CFM lesson at home when the family got back, which I really enjoyed. We also had our neighbor Amir over for dinner and a lesson with the sister missionaries. They had to teach over Zoom though. It was so cool to be a member present at a lesson and to see the importance of fellow-shipping someone. I'm so proud of my family for the missionary work they are doing!!

I can't end without expressing my gratitude to my Savior and Heavenly Father for blessing me with such amazing opportunities--and for such faithful and wonderful family and friends.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

MJ's Bridal Shower and Reception

 3 August - 9 August 2020

Hello my family! I was quite the social butterfly this week!

Monday: I went to the library to study and attend a work meeting. By the time I got home, I rushed to shopping to get food and a gift for Megan Jean's bridal shower that I had been invited to. I made her a framed "love" that you can hook your ring onto at night. The bridal shower was really cute and fun. We played some various games and got to watch her open all of her gifts.

Tuesday: After attending a meeting for work, I went over to my previous mission companion Becca's house to catch up and do art together. I water-colored a figure skater, which was pretty fun! I had to be present for a work meeting in the middle of painting for about 30 minutes, but Becca is super chill and didn't mind. We had fun! 

Wednesday: Today was my last session meeting with my therapist! I've improved so much over the last couple of months. I feel so much more at peace. I feel happier and more hopeful. I have better relationships with others and don't waste as much time and energy worrying about things. Like the GRE! I am taking it in a week from today, and I haven't panicked or stressed much about it. I'm just doing all I can to prepare. I'm so grateful to Heavenly Father. I truly feel and believe that He has great things in store for me.

Thursday: I really wanted to go ice skating today, but I also needed to take a three hour practice exam since I'm taking the GRE next Wednesday, so I woke up early, got down to the library right when it opened, and took the test. I then was able to make it home and to the ice rink right when it opened. Wow, skating on the smooth ice after studying all morning was unbelievably refreshing. I had a huge smile on my face as I zoomed around the ice. I love the freedom and progression of skating. It requires a lot of practice and control. That evening, I attended Megan Jean's wedding reception. It was at a beautiful location, and they had dancing. It was super fun! Wow, her family can dance! I usually shy away, but I just went for it and had a blast dancing and laughing with our friend group.

        

Friday: Maybe I partied a little too hard because I wasn't feeling all that great today. I took it easy and just reviewed answers from the practice exam and relaxed. I drank TONS of herbal tea as well. Guess I wasn't made out to be a party animal after all...

Saturday: I still wasn't feeling all that great, but as I got going in the morning, I felt better. I went with friends up to rock canyon to help film a funny video for someone's YouTube channel (called Dinner Guest) so I guess I'll be pretty famous one of these days! ;) Then I went down to the library to study with Whitney, and I took another practice exam. I did a bit better, so I feel more and more confident about taking the GRE. Then I went home and ate some dinner before heading out with my roommates to go ice skating! We all had fun... though we did wear Lily out :). One thing I love about ice skating is the community. I love giving people thumbs up when they do cool tricks or talking with them. I make lots of ice skating friends, even just by smiling at people. After we got home, I went over to a game night. There were homemade fries for us to eat, and we talked and played games. One was pretty loud and noisy, called Trigger (similar to Psychiatrist except we all have our own symptoms that get triggered by another's actions) and played until midnight. Y'all, I guess I am cut out for the party life after all! Maybe... :) It was good to be social in a large group where you feel comfortable and have lots of fun. At one point in the game, anytime someone said "um," I had to shout out, "Don't touch my pancakes!!" We had lots of fun laughs.

Sunday: One thing I didn't realize worried me until I had a thought this morning was that I don't want guys who I don't also like back to like me. It's always made me feel awkward, uncomfortable, and guilty for some reason. But I had a spark of revelation that when you do like someone, it adds anticipation and excitement into your life. You look forward to things more and life is less dull (even if sometimes stressful learning how to deal with your feelings). And so it's good if guys like you because you are making their life just a bit better, just by you being likable and awesome. They have their own lives to live and lessons to learn, and you cannot control how they feel. But don't forget the good things about having a crush! My roommate Lily gave a talk in sacrament meeting! It was really good and funny. Something she said really touched me. She said that Jesus Christ is the most powerful person she knows. No person, demon, or devil is more powerful than Him. And we have access to His strength and power through the priesthood. When we are overwhelmed or struggling, we can call on the One who never fell or gave in to our adversary. There is such power in knowing that we are fighting on a side that will never lose. God will conquer Satan. I know Whose side I stand on. I also had a really good time at Come, Follow Me. My roommate Susan asked to come. I truly felt God speak through me a couple of times to share very insightful things that I've learned that really seemed to help others. I love when you have the opportunity to strengthen each other in the gospel through your witness and testimony. I feel like God has blessed me with such wisdom and unique experiences/insights so that I can help and encourage His other children. It is such a sacred and ennobling opportunity.

I love my Savior. I love that even though part of this life includes suffering, our pain allows us to be mini saviors in the lives of others. Our trials bring us empathy and compassion. They help us lift others around us who are also struggling. We can come closer to the Savior as we catch a glimpse of the suffering He underwent for us. Suffering is not trivial. It has purpose, and knowing that can help us endure it with renewed vigor and strength.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Vanessa's Wedding Reception

27 July - 2 August 2020

Monday

I've been so good at keeping my exercising up this whole week! When I don't go biking, I stay inside and do a work out from this app called Fit On. I went to the library early this morning to start a practice GRE exam, and I did pretty okay on the writing and reading section. I didn't have time to do the math section before my stomach demanded that I go home and feed it.

Tuesday

I emailed BYU's MFT program directors to get my name out there and see what else I can do to become a more competitive applicant to the program. I got a response back that while the GRE is no longer a requirement as of this year (WHAT THE WHAT?!?!?!) we are still encouraged to take it. Well, yeah, I already paid for it and it's nonrefundable, so you better bet I'm still taking it. But today I did the math sections and... well yikes. I ran out of time to finish 6 questions, both times. So I didn't even do 12 total! The math section is going to be much harder than I previously assumed... but oh well. Who needs to know complex math as a therapist, right?

Wednesday

I was a bit distracted as I drove down to the ice rink, talking with my mom on the phone, that I didn't notice a biking crossing right in front of me until I was close enough to see the panicked look on her face. I slammed on the brakes and missed her by a good six inches... yikes a doodle. But on the bright side, skating was super fun and I am making good progress on power pulls (but just my right side). A fun thing about going skating is to smile at others and give them thumbs ups on their moves or to compliment them. It always makes both of us feel good. Well, when I tried to compliment this one guy at the rink today, he was so awkward about it!! I complimented his use of deep edges and he said, "Thanks. It takes lots of practice. Kay bye," and then turned away. Welp. That won't stop me from being friendly in the future!

Thursday

I was asked to give a talk this Sunday! It wasn't a lot of time in advance, so maybe someone had to cancel or something. I also had a super fun time this week video chatting with my family, and I found you can do these really silly filters and play games. Lucy and I had quite the time messing around with it. And I decided that I should legit wear a flower crown around because I look like a princess :).

Friday

I tried to be productive today and get some work done this afternoon, but I suddenly felt tired. I thought to myself, "Oh, I'll just a quick nap." Yeah, well that turned into an hour long nap and I woke up feeling groggy and nauseous. I had wanted to attend my trainer's wedding reception, but I wasn't feeling up to going alone. Then my sweet roommate Lily offered to go with me. We talked all the way up to Salt Lake, and the hour drive only felt like twenty minutes! And it was interesting to get to play psychologist for a bit as we talked about some of her struggles and concerns. The backyard of the reception was gorgeous! And I ran into Robyn, a girl I knew from the mission that had come out to live in Utah! I hadn't seen her in three years, but she remembered my first name! And we saw a super tall guy who was three inches over seven feet tall! It was hard to not stare whenever he walked by. And he made his wife look so short, even though she was on the tall side (just not compared to him). That evening, Lily was feeling stressed because our other roommate wasn't home to take her to her night shift, so I offered to take her.

Saturday

Oh yikes. I woke up this morning around six feeling SO nauseous and sick. I was legit going to throw up. I took it easy all day, watching some relaxing and chill movies (literally... Frozen and Frozen 2). I also worked on editing the dating advice video for my YouTube channel, which I was so excited about posting. I probably wouldn't have left the house at all if Whitney hadn't called me and asked me to go shopping with her. I agreed, even though I didn't really need to buy anything. I went to bed so early.

Sunday

I woke up at 5am feeling pretty refreshed, which makes a lot of sense because I went to bed around 7pm last night! I wrote my talk, and I was so grateful that everything just flowed and came to me, especially since trying to write it yesterday was  not productive with how awful I was feeling. I was so nervous and I think it was because I was going to share a lot of personal experiences. I was told by many people that I did well, and one of my neighbors told me that was exactly what she needed to hear today. I was so priveledged to get to hear the song that Whitney wrote for one of her religion class projects. I went to Come, Follow Me, which is always a good time. When I got home, I decided to make strawberry scones for dinner! It was my first time making them, and I think they turned out pretty alright (despite me not knowing what they are regularly supposed to taste like).

Today my testimony of the Atonement of Jesus Christ was strengthened. We don't do good works to pay a debt for our sins or earn our way to Heaven. Jesus Christ has paid the price. We are free from jail if we accept Him. But He wants us to reach out, take His outstretched hand, and walk the covenant path so we can learn to BE like Him. We keep commandments and covenants so that we can become like God. Not just be justified through His sacrifice, but be redeemed and changed as we try to resemble the Savior, so that when we stand before God, we won't just be with Him; we will be like Him. And we will be comfortable staying there and living the life He lives.

Much love,

Emily Burnham