Self Improvement

            Last week, I was asked to give a spiritual thought at ward prayer on Sunday. After saying I would love to give the spiritual thought, I prayed about what to share, but nothing really came to mind. A couple of days passed, and I realized I still hadn't thought if anything. I talked with my roommate and sister, asking them what they thought I should talk about. They both suggested that I should pray. Finally, Sunday morning, as I sat down to read my scriptures, I prayed to be inspired by something I would read. As I read through the chapter, I marked important verses and phrases, yet nothing really jumped out at me--until the very last two verses. As King Benjamin finishes his speech to his people in chapter 4, he urges his people to be careful so they do not sin. Mosiah 4:29-30 reads "And finally, I cannot tell you all the things whereby ye may commit sin; for there are divers ways and means, even so many that I cannot number them. But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not."

                I am really familiar Mosiah 4:30 since it is a scripture mastery—one of the few I still have memorized due to seminary. I have learned the importance of watching your thoughts, because thoughts lead to words and actions. However, as I contemplated the verse right before it, about the many ways we can sin, a few questions came to mind: How well do you know yourself? How well does Satan know you? How well does God know you? It is important that we all know ourselves—our strengths and weaknesses—in order to be able to watch ourselves. Satan at least knows are weaknesses, because that is how he tempts us. However, God knows not only our weaknesses and strengths, but also how to turn our weaknesses INTO strengths (Ether 12:27). He knows us perfectly—better than we know ourselves. Thus, we should all take personal inventories every week with ourselves and God, recognizing where we fell short and how to improve. Instead of brushing aside your sins and weaknesses, truly come to know yourself—what you struggle with, things you are tempted by—so that you can specifically pray for those weaknesses to become strengths. I know as we work on improving ourselves, we will come closer to God. As we turn to Him for strength and help, He will lead us on a path of self-discovery and make us stronger than we could ever be alone.

Likened Unto an Olive Tree

I am feeling pretty ambitious this week because I have decided to tackle the longest chapter in the Book of Mormon—with just a verse. If I am being perfectly honest, this semester has been a LOT harder than last semester. As a result, I am often exhausted and stressed. But surprisingly, I have had a greater amount of joy and satisfaction. Seriously, I cannot survive this semester alone; it has been forcing me to rely on the Lord and His promised blessings. It has been both a trial of faith and a huge blessing. Now, what does this have to do with Jacob 5, the longest chapter in the Book of Mormon? Well, in my class, we discussed the background of this chapter. The House of Israel is compared to an olive tree, and the Lord of the Vineyard visits it four times and does 5 specific things throughout the chapter to his trees:  prunes, digs, dungs (nourishes), grafts, and burns. It mentions three of these actions in Jacob 5:27, “But behold, the servant said unto him: Let us prune it, and dig about it, and nourish it a little longer, that perhaps it may bring forth good fruit unto thee, that thou canst lay it up against the season.”

I feel like one of these trees the Lord is shaping. This semester I’ve been pruned—certain things have been cut out of my life because I literally don’t have time for them. And it’s been a huge blessing. I’m a better person because of it. The Lord has dug around me, loosening my stubbornness/pride and giving me trials to grow from in order to prepare me to be in a state where I can hear and act on His counsel—so that I can be nourished. I have learned to rely on God’s strength when I don’t have enough strength by myself. I have learned to be more humble, especially when I start comparing myself to others in regards to grades or spirituality. I have also had grafted branches implanted into my tree (so to speak). I’ve found service opportunities I never would have participated in before, like volunteering at an Elementary school. I’ve found so many ways to bless others with food or small, but heartfelt, letters. As I’ve tried to stay on top of school work and balance everything going on, I’ve noticed that God is burning my weaknesses and sins away, which hurts right now in the moment, but will someday make me stronger. I truly believe the Lord is purifying me so that He can use me for some greater purpose where I can produce good fruit/works.

  This has been comforting to know because it gives me hope that the Lord has a bigger picture for me than I can see right now.  Remember when life is difficult, and you feel like you are being cut up or dug about, the Lord is refining you. Hope and faith will carry you through. As President Thomas S. Monson once said, “the future is as bright as your faith.”

The Testimony of Two Nations

During this week, I have had had so many experiences that have made me realize just how wonderful and true the Book of Mormon is. As I was reading through it this week, I came upon a passage that perfectly describes how the Book of Mormon and Bible fit and work together. In 2 Nephi 29:6-8, Nephi quotes God, who chastises those who say they already have a Bible and need no more scripture. In these verses, the Lord asks, “Have ye obtained a Bible save it were by the Jews? Know ye not that there are more nations than one?” The Lord goes on to say that He has led many people around the world and has commanded them to write. “Wherefore murmur ye, because that ye shall receive more of my word? Know ye not that the testimony of two nations is a witness unto you that I am God, that I remember one nation like unto another? Wherefore, I speak the same words unto one nation like unto another. And when the two nations shall run together the testimony of the two nations shall run together also.” I love how this fits with the LDS doctrine of revelation. When God speaks to a prophet, it is considered like scripture. God works in the same ways as he did in times of old. He has called a prophet today and commands him to write, just like the prophets in the Bible.

 In addition to gaining a spiritual witness from God that this book is true, there are so many intricate details throughout the Book of Mormon that strengthen my testimony of its truthfulness. For example, in my religion class, my teacher pointed out that in Hebrew, there are no commas or punctuation, so in order to separate items in a list, they use a symbol, which works the same way as the word “and” in the English language. Therefore, whenever there is a list of items quoted, the words are separated by “and” instead of with commas. This is also why many sentences begin with “And.” This is one small detail that is easily overlooked or may be taken wrongly by critics of the Book of Mormon who might say that a book written with so many grammatical errors could not have come from God. I testify that the Book of Mormon is true, that it comes from God and testifies of Christ, and that God uses imperfect humans to carry about His perfect work. As a result of this knowledge, I have a strong desire to share the gospel and bring others unto Jesus Christ.

Rejoice, O My Heart

                The past few weeks have been very difficult because for some reason I’ve felt very discouraged and frustrated with myself and my weaknesses. I was also constantly feeling tired as a result of a heavy homework-load and early-morning custodial job. As I was down in the dumps, I just so happened to read a chapter in the scriptures that related perfectly to what I was feeling. Isn’t God’s timing the best? I was reading in 2 Nephi 4 where Nephi says,

“Behold, my soul delighteth in the things of the Lord; and my heart pondereth continually upon the things which I have seen and heard. Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities. I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me… Awake my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart…” (2 Nephi 4: 16-18, 28).

Nephi is such an inspiration to me because even though he has seen visions and miracles from the Lord, this passage illustrates that he too is subject to sin and depression, but he is able to overcome these feelings by turning to the Lord and gaining joy and peace. I was then able to turn to the Lord and gain a perspective of hope that everything would work out, that God was happy with me, and that I shouldn’t be too hard on myself. My doubts turned to joy, and I know it was only because I turned to God, just as Nephi taught through his actions.

Goodly Parents

               One of the hardest things about starting college was leaving my family behind. I absolutely adore my parents, and I call them every day (well, sometimes three times a day because they don’t always answer the phone). Being on my own in a different state has made me appreciate my parents more than ever, especially because they are still helping me out financially so that I can receive a college education. They have given me a lot of advice and wisdom throughout my life that has helped me to survive living on my own, ranging from teaching me about the importance of being frugal and working hard, to avoiding strangers and saying “no” to drugs. In many ways I can relate to Nephi when he says in that he was born of goodly parents, taught in the ways of his father, had many trials and afflictions regarding his family (including brothers that beat him up and tried killing him multiple times), yet learned a lot and was favored in the sight of the Lord (1 Nephi 1:1). As I have studied this passage in the Book of Mormon, I have realized the importance of having great parents to look up to. I am grateful for my parent’s example to me, and I hope to be a good parent and teacher to my children in the future. No one has perfect parents, but mine are perfect for me. I know that God gave us our specific families to help us grow and learn in ways that otherwise wouldn’t be possible. Yes, I sometimes don’t get along with my parents or siblings, but I’ve had amazing spiritual experiences and much fun and laughter with my family. Families are central to God’s plan of happiness, and I hope we can all work on ways to strengthen our families!