Miracles Never Cease

24 February - 1 May 2020

Monday
I must have spent at least four hours at the BYU Health Clinic today! I wanted to figure out why I've been feeling off these past weeks, such as having trouble breathing. Well, all my results came back normal (nope, I don't have anemia or diabetes or asthma). But she had me take an anxiety/depression test and I scored pretty high on those. Since it wasn't anything else, this made me truly reflect on just how serious anxiety has been in my life. I've been fine! But I always feel just a bit anxious--about everything! Maybe it is affecting me more than I realized. Anyways, the best part of today was that the Lord answered my prayer so quickly! I had to run laps outside for the asthma test, and it was so cold that I prayed for the sun to come out and warm me up. Not even five minutes later, the clouds parted and glorious sunshine rained down upon me. What a tender mercy!

Tuesday
One guy in my figure skating class randomly asked me today, "How do you feel about blind dates?" I said I thought they were fine and asked if someone was trying to set him up on one. "No, but I want to set you up on one!" he said. So he got my number to give the other guy... but we'll see if anything actually comes of it. Today in ice skating class, we all tried on hockey skates because it was the day where all the hockey players had to learn figure skating moves, and we all had to learn hockey skills. Well, long story short, I hate hockey skates. I got quite the show of bruises to show for how coordinated I was in those horrific things...

Wednesday
My religion research class today was actually really good! We had six different stake presidents, bishops, and a returned mission president come and answer questions about religiosity in youth. We had such an inspiring discussion (even though I wasn't feeling particularly well today) and afterwards I felt inspired to give them all fliers (that I had conveniently brought) to my YouTube channel. Afterwards, my mentor, Dr. Dyer, asked how I was and I actually answered quite honestly. Awful. He asked if I wanted to speak with him in his office, so I said sure. We went and talked about my anxiety and he gave some very solid counsel about medication and what it does and helps with. He said some people are more sensitive and their environment really affects them. If it's a good environment, they flourish. But if it's a stressful or bad environment, they do poorly. Medication can help during the hard times so the environment isn't such a huge factor. I was really grateful that I followed that prompting to talk to him instead of giving the cliché "I'm good" answer. Such inspired counsel. Plus, during the class, Miranda sent me a bunch of cute inspirational quotes that really touched me.

Thursday
Today's marriage enhancement class was super weird. Deja vu moment. The guy sitting next to me turns to me after class and asks how I feel about blind dates. I said they're fine. He said he knew a super nice guy, so I gave him my number to pass along. That was so funny... twice in one week! Also during that class, I totally got called out by the teacher for being single. In front of the whole class! Oh well, at least I was in a good mood and didn't take it too personally. It's not completely my fault that I'm single. I'm trying here, okay! :) Later that evening, I met up with my friend Eliza from my religion class and we ate fries and talked about missionary work and life in general. It was good. I truly am so blessed! Also, my roommate Katie sticky-note-attacked my door with the cutest sayings and it made me feel so loved. I feel so blessed and eternally grateful to have her as my roommate.

Friday
Today I was all on my own at the temple! I did a great job! I didn't forget too many things :). It is so peaceful there and definitely feels like home. I got to be in one of the "greet" positions by the entrance, and there is a picture of Christ there that I looked at. I said a prayer of gratitude for my Savior to my Father in Heaven, and it was such a tender moment to be in their home and to feel completely at peace. I had the insight that what I am doing in the temple is exactly like what I did on my mission. Not only am I serving other people, but I am praying for the patrons to feel the Spirit. I'm praying that I will be filled with the Spirit so I can make each ordinance a sacred experience. I look for those who are lost or need help. I am set apart and have the authority to perform these sacred ordinances, and I feel so honored and humbled. When I got back from the temple, I had a missed call from one of the blind-date guys. We met up for a late lunch and it was fine. He was nice, but I don't think we clicked well. I went and picked up a camera from the library and filmed a couple for my channel about the topic of scrupulosity (if you don't know what that means, I guess you'll have to wait to watch the video... or just Google it). Then I had some work in the coding lab to do, but I didn't finish all the way and I started feeling super anxious, especially when a friend in the ward wanted to do something later in the evening. I just couldn't emotionally, so instead I finished early in the lab and relaxed at home. The people above us were having quite the booming party (apparently the cops showed up) and our ceiling (and bed) were shaking from all the jumping and dancing. I'm glad it didn't cave in! Even though today was a bit stressful, I also received the sweetest note from McCall in our ward.

Saturday
I went shopping this morning! I found a good deal on an outfit to get for Sunday and I also found some super comfortable exercise pants. I also got my car washed (I won't say how long it had been...) and worked for a couple of hours. Then I went to the Osborn's house to film them talking about friendship in marriage (they were so cute). I finished the night by watching Captain America since I hadn't seen it in so long.

Sunday
I was excited for today. I had my new cute outfit and I was teaching Sunday School. It went well! In the middle of church, it started pouring down snow, and of course I didn't bring a jacket with me... haha, so I got pretty snowed on by the time I got home! I loved church, though. So many amazing testimonies were born and I felt so edified. Right after church, I filmed my friend Spencer for my YouTube channel. I'm pretty excited with how everything is coming along. I also received the nicest comments on my video that posted today! That made me so very happy. I wrote nice-notes during Come Follow Me and Reconnect and then delivered them. I also attended ward prayer and ward choir.

This week had its ups and downs. Some days were harder than others. But I felt Heavenly Father's love. I'm learning lots about becoming like my Savior and Father in Heaven. Life is sometimes so overwhelming that it's hard for me to see my progress, and I do have a lot I'm doing (it's hard for me to remember how much I can actually juggle) but I know the Lord is magnifying my time and my efforts to do miraculous things. I'm grateful for the gift of listening. I am far from perfect and make so many stupid mistakes, but I really am trying to be like and act like Jesus Christ in every circumstance, with every person.

Love,
Emily Burnham

Social Butterfly

17 February - 23 February 2020

Hey friends and family!

Monday was super nice because we didn't have school. I still felt sick, so I didn't do very much. I feel blessed that I can work from home because this past week, I've really needed that luxury since I haven't been feeling super well. That evening, I got invited by my friend Lexy to attend a bonfire, and I went! Even though it was super last minute and I had just eaten three giant potato's worth of homemade fries, I went. Such a proud moment for me.

Tuesday was pretty nice because we had Monday's schedule, so I only had one class. I was able to work some more hours from home and attend a TA review for neuro, since our test is this week. I've been studying hard! I also went swing dancing with a small group from the ward and danced with four different guys.

One of the girls in my research group that meets every Wednesday, Eliza, was so pumped when she found out about my YouTube channel. She made me remember why I started it and how I felt at the beginning. It made me feel so good! She has so many ideas and wants to help with it, which is super exciting. We're basically great friends now, and I'm excited to get to know her better!

We had the most bomb speaker at our class Thursday night! I hadn't been looking forward to it because he was going to speak on pornography in marriage. But he was funny and had so many great points. I learned a lot about emotions and triggers. It was so insightful and inspiring! As we describe and recognize our feelings, they have less power over us. And usually we turn to whatever we're addicted to because we don't like how we are feeling and want to escape. But as we recognize those "trigger" feelings, we can better control and manage them before they lead us to act on pornography or eating disorders, etc.

Friday was a great day. Kind of. I got to serve in the temple from 9:15 to 2pm, and I absolutely love the ladies I serve with in the temple. I got to work with Fran again, and I got to sit in an endowment session! The only hard part was that I was having trouble breathing normally and was feeling very stressed with everything else I had to do. A tender mercy came after the session. The coordinator lady in charge told me I could take a break, so I was able to eat a snack and get some water in the break room. Fran had noticed I was a little less happy/peppy than the first time she had worked with me and asked what was wrong. I told her my stomach was kind of hurting and I was having a hard time breathing. But I still did my best to make each ordinance special in the initiatories, though I didn't feel as good as usual. And Fran felt the Spirit. She came out of the initiatory room crying and said she felt there Spirit in there. That made me feel so grateful and humbled. Even when we are not at our best, the Lord can still work through us with His Spirit. I was feeling stressed today because I had to code some videos for my research class, and I was actually praying that the system would have a bug so I wouldn't have to do it... and guys, God answers prayers! I couldn't get it to work no matter what I tried, so I got to go home early and work on other things I needed to do! Isaac, Cheyanne, and some other friends came over and we had dinner together. I had to leave a bit early because we had my basketball game that night... and we won! The other team wasn't actually all that good, but I psyched myself out and was missing all my shots. Finally, there was just a few minutes left on the clock and I REALLY wanted to make a basket. My team was so encouraging and kept passing me the ball, and finally, right before the final buzzard went off, I made a basket! SCORE! It was a good evening.

Sunday was rather exhausting. I filmed six people! Two for my channel (they bore their testimony in their mission language), and the others where the Thomas's and Witts for a class project. It was so fun to go to their homes and to visit with them. I was able to talk with the Witts for TWO HOURS! We had a really great, genuine conversation, and they are some of my favorite peeps now! It was so enjoyable to get to know them better and for them to talk to me like an equal and really listen to my thoughts. I'm curious how the final video will turn out for my project! I also received the sweetest text from a friend that was in my Art Education class last semester about how I was the "bestest" person she knows and she loves my YouTube channel. The videos have really helped and inspired her, and she is so grateful she met me. It made me cry. I'm helping people! I'm making a difference! I'm a force for good in the world!

Haha, it took me a hot second to remember what I did on Saturday. Now I remember why. It kinda sucked. I cleaned all morning because we had an intense cleaning check. BUT WE PASSED! Then I had to rush off to work (I had an APA workshop to do for my TA job). Then I had to finish studying and go take my Behavioral Neurobiology exam that afternoon. It was harder than I thought it would be. I had felt pretty confident going in. I was too scared to look at my grade, so I didn't. Yeah, not the most pleasant day.

I know Heavenly Father loves me and is answering my prayers. Sometimes those prayers are answered in unexpected ways. I am grateful for His love and presence. I do not doubt His love. It is so real and tangible to me. I am grateful for my friends who support me in times of trial. I am grateful for my Savior who understands what I'm going through.

Much love,
Emily Burnham

P.S. So sorry that I don't have any pictures! I guess I was too busy having fun to take any!

I Can Feel the Love

10 February - 16 February 2020

I love my Savior Jesus Christ. I love my Father in Heaven. And I love my family. Also, my ward is pretty great, too! No matter what happens every week, my God is there for me. I am humbled by the amazing lessons He is teaching me and awed by the outpouring of His love that comes when I don't feel like I deserve it. My Heavenly Father is the perfect example of love to me. He knows how to encourage us at our lowest moments and love us in our weakest moments. I have a goal to be like Him. To love others in their weakest moments so they can feel His love through me. What's the point of judging people for their weaknesses? How does that help them—or us?
Here are some highlights of my past week:

Monday
We had dinner at the Bishop's home for FHE. I got to meet some new guys in the ward and talk with a bunch of different people, plus eat a delicious meal! I definitely had a loss of appetite today and didn't feel well, but I was able to overcome that and still find joy in the day. Also, my new favorite song if the week? My mom introduced it to me: "Gonna Get Along Without Ya Now."

Tuesday
Still felt a bit off today, but ice skating makes everything better! I'm slowly (very, very slowly) improving! But I love the feeling of progression, and I love getting better at something very few other people do. The kids were a bit crazy at piano lessons today. I think that means they like me? Or are at least more comfortable with me! They really are good kids and I enjoy getting to see them every week.

Wednesday
I feel so blessed with an amazing job currently. I am making more than I ever have before at BYU, plus I get to work many of my hours from home. And I feel very fulfilled by helping others to succeed in their online courses.

Thursday
We got heart-attacked by some cuties in our ward! This made me feel so loved and happy. Service makes everyone feel good.

Friday
My temple shift was good. I had a new lady training me today. I love seeing people I know at the temple! And my family sent me the cutest card! I love that my dad said, "I hope you know how loved you are back home. I hope you find someone up there to love you too." Haha, dad. I'm trying! That afternoon, I spent some time at the library editing videos. On my way home, some cute girls handed me a Valentine! I also had the opportunity to receive a priesthood blessing because I have had trouble breathing for the past week and haven't been feeling well. It was a wonderful blessing. I know Heavenly Father is aware of me and the progress I am making. He is proud that I am learning to turn to Him with my concerns. So many people think it is a weakness to seek help, but Heavenly Father sees it as a strength. A sign of meekness and humility. I went with Whitney to a intramural basketball game and afterwards stopped by a Vday party a girl in our ward was having.

Saturday
I don't think I did anything today. I just felt sick and relaxed. I worked from home for a couple of hours and did laundry. I also watched a lot of movies/shows on Amazon Prime! I am trying to take good care of this body God has gifted me with.

Sunday
So many people were gone today! Due to the long weekend, many travelled home. Including all of my roommates! So I had the whole apartment to myself this weekend. It was cool that my roomies and friends were gone so that I could reach out to new people and make new friends.

Life is good, even when you aren't feeling good. God is always so good to me. I'm grateful for the opportunity I've had for Him to shape my views and help me progress. I love Him!

Much love,
Emily Burnham

Temple Worker

3 February - 9 February 2020

Monday
I awoke at 6:30 this morning and drove down to start my new job as a Peer Mentor! I didn't actually know what I was supposed to do at first, but I worked for three hours before heading off to class. I 100% recommend that everyone take SFL 376 (aka Healthy Sexuality). I did TA work that afternoon, then went down to my research class lab thing. Yup. Not a very exciting day... That evening for FHE, we just ended up talking instead of watching a movie, which was A-okay with me!

Tuesday
In my badminton class this morning, a guy asked me on a date! That came as a surprise, but I was actually very flattered. I am becoming more proficient at ice skating (my skates are nice now that they have been re-sharpened!) and am really enjoying the class! That evening, I was feeling a bit sad, but I was able to go catch the end of institute and learn about prayers and how to make them more meaningful. I was able to turn outward and talk with a guy from my ward and have a great conversation with him. I feel my ability of talking to guys growing. It is becoming a strength of mine, and that is truly a miracle and blessing from God.

Wednesday
Work is super fulfilling! I love feeling like I am part of something bigger than myself that is helping so many struggling students. After my class, I went and took my badminton exam (95%) and then went home to do homework before my evening class. One really cool thing that we discussed in class was this experience a lady had where she grew up in a home with an emotionally absent father, so it was hard for her to understand her Heavenly Father. One day, she prayed and asked Heavenly Father to teach her about His real character and nature and to remove any lies or misconceptions she had about Him. That was so inspiring to me, and I prayed that later that night and had a cool experience as I realized that sometimes I think God is only out to teach me hard lessons, but really He desires to bless me SO SO much because He loves me. Lessons come as a result, but He first and foremost wants me to be happy beyond my imagination.

Thursday
I took my Healthy Sexuality exam (100%) after my Neurobiology class. I also drove down to help Julia's kids practice piano, which then made me 30 minutes late to my Marriage Enhancement class, but it all worked out! I also had a wonderful talk with my roommate where she helped me SO much with some of the things I was feeling. One thing I realized was that I am afraid to ask for big blessings for fear of it not being God's will or not receiving it. I realized that is a lack of faith and boldness. When Joseph Smith went to pray, he had every assurance that he would see a Heavenly Messenger. Katie told me that it is important to ask God for the things I really want because I have been living a virtuous life and Heavenly Father really desires to give me those blessings. He will if I ask with confidence that I will receive them. And it's okay to be bold. Nephi was, Enos was, Joseph was.

Friday
I was so excited (and a teensy bit nervous) for my temple shift this morning! It was absolutely wonderful. I didn't realize how much I would love it, and a lot of that was because I have an amazing trainer. She is super spunky and funny, but also very spiritual and takes the ordinances so seriously. It was absolutely amazing to realize that I hold the power and authority to perform these eternal ordinances. So humbling. That afternoon, I went down to code marital videos and was reminded about the importance of believing that others can change. If you don't believe others can change in marriage, you are not only sending a message to your spouse that you don't believe in them or trust them, but also that you don't truly believe or understand the Atonement of Jesus Christ. I believe in the gift of repentance. People can and DO change overnight. I know from personal experience. I am so grateful for my Savior who gives me the opportunity to become a better version of myself each and every day. When I got home from that, I immediately went over to the church for a Relief Society activity, where we had a panel of boys answer any questions we had about dating. On the way home from the event, I was talking with two of the guys and remembered my assignment to give out 10 sincere compliments, so I asked if I could and they said, "sure." They lit up and were so happy after my compliments, and it made me feel so good in return. I need to remember the power that comes from a deep, genuine compliment to another! That evening, I had the special opportunity to listen to and comfort one of my roommates who is going through a challenging situation. It was amazing to feel the Spirit speak through me. I miss that feeling and need to remember that as well! Also, my temple watch finally arrived, only a day late!

Saturday
Well, we got completely smashed at our basketball game this morning. Not only was I having problems breathing, but everyone seemed a bit off their game today, and the final score was 11 to 58. Yikes-a-doodle. Welp. Yeah. So now I am so much more motivated to get in shape and want to run at least twice a week so I don't die during games. Afterwards, my friend Lexy took me out for a birthday lunch and we ended up talking for over two hours. She just got broken up with, and I was able to ask how she was doing and really listen. We also talked a lot about marriage and how it truly is our choice who we marry. God isn't going to force us to marry someone (especially someone we don't find attractive) because He has given us the agency to choose for ourselves. And then after we choose to marry that person, we choose to stay loyal to them everyday. I've had the opportunity to listen to and support so many people this week. It truly is an honor (and is so much better than talking about yourself). That evening, Isaac came over and I was able to talk with him and give him a big hug because he was also struggling. I'm grateful that I can be there to support everyone around me as they are going through such difficult things at this time.

Sunday
Church was really good. I was asked to say the closing prayer, and I wasn't actually nervous until I was standing up in front of the podium. I way overanalyze things, but it's something I am working on and I know the Lord is helping me. It was really good though. I was nervous because I wanted it to be sincere and heartfelt. And I'm so proud of myself because I talked to a cute guy at church today! Which, if you knew me last year... that is so not like me. I am coming a long way, and the good news is that there is hope that I'll actually get married one day because I don't avoid males anymore! ;) We had Come, Follow Me and I learned so many things. It was absolutely amazing. We talked about the power God has in speaking His words. He said, "Let there be light" and there was light. Likewise, as we pray, we have the opportunity to wax bold in prayer and approach His throne of grace boldly, asking for miracles, things we need or want. And He desires to give them to us if we just ask. By so doing, we are becoming like Him because our words have power to bring things to pass as well (through Him).

If there is one takeaway from this week, it is that the best parts of my week were the opportunities I had to minister and listen to other people. Even if it took hours from my week, it was well worth it and much more meaningful than doing homework. And God will bless me to accomplish all that is needful. After all, through Him, I've been able to maintain great grades and scholarships, even making it onto the Dean's list these past two semesters! He has me covered in the school department, so I need to be more anxiously engaged in helping others instead of homework!

Much love,
Emily Burnham

Birthday Week!

27 January - 2 February 2020

Perspective can turn a tough day or week into something sweet. I had a lot of hard things happen this week, but I was blessed to see so many small tender mercies that reminded me of my Heavenly Father's love and care. To top it off, I had an awesome birthday night!

Monday
I've had Harry Potter on my mind lately since I began planning a trip back to visit my mission and then to go to Harry Potter World... so surprise surprise... for FHE, we had an art night and I drew Lord Voldemort as "the scream" with my partner. It turned out pretty good--scary, actually.

Tuesday
I had a busy day, but I woke up this morning with the feeling to make dinner for a guy in the ward who had told me about a rough experience he was going through. I didn't know if it would be awkward since we don't know each other super well, but I decided that if it was a prompting, I would go through with it. I also got set apart today at the Provo City Center Temple to be an ordinance worker, and I'll start next Friday! After classes and work, I rushed to make a quick soup before my neuro review but no one was home when I went to drop it off. So I thought to myself, "Eh, forget the whole thing." But then later that night my roommate convinced me to follow through because it had been a prompting. He still wasn't home so I left it with his roommate. That evening was actually super fun because I went with two other people from the ward to the BYU Swing Dancing club night, and I actually danced with a lot of guys and enjoyed myself! I picked up on it pretty quick, and the guy in my ward even did a cool flip trick called the "can-opener" with me, which was pretty epic.

Wednesday
I got hired for a new job as a peer mentor for BYU Online! I will be helping to initiate a program for students who are failing their classes and will take an active part in reaching out to them and ensuring they receive any and all the help they need. Plus, with this new job comes a pay-raise to $14 an hour! What a huge financial blessing. The Lord is so good to me :) That night, I went with Kathrine to a Harry Potter party event and our house won overall! So we got free Creamery ice-cream coupons!

Thursday
I had a really cool experience this morning. When I woke up, I felt a bit anxious and had doubts creeping into my mind, but I fought them, recognizing they were lies. Then suddenly, all those negative feelings and insecurities were taken away, and I felt the presence of my Heavenly Father. I felt His love and warmth and knew He was so pleased with me. It was the best feeling in the entire world. It only lasted for a few seconds, but it completely filled and reassured me.

Friday
As birthdays start out, it wasn't the best. I ran out of breakfast foods and was so hungry, so I decided to go shopping before going to the temple. But then my car was making weird noises so I pulled over ot check the engine and called my dad who said to stop by AutoZone or somewhere. By the time all was said and done, nothing got fixed but I think it's alright. But then I had to go to work, so I didn't end up going to the temple, and I was still kind of hungry. I worked for a couple of hours and didn't eat lunch until almost 2pm. Then I had more homework to do, and then I went to code videos at a building on campus, but it wouldn't work for me, so I quit and went home to make a cake (that I thought I ruined, but then it turned out good). All in all, I was utterly exhausted and tired, but wanted to have a good evening. My favorite part was that the rink (upon my request) played Taylor Swift's song 22, so I got to skate around and dance to that, which was super fun. Then we had games at my house, and a really good number of people showed up, and there was lots of laughter and food. Kathrine was such a great friend and stayed behind to help clean up and talk.

Saturday
I went this morning to get my ice skates permanently mounted and sharpened at Shaun's place, then tried to do homework. It was actually such a nice day outside that I had trouble staying inside, so after taking a walk outside, I read from my textbook outside on the grass to soak up some sun. I didn't get super far in my reading, but I can at least tell you the difference between a cone and rod in the eye!

Sunday
I taught Sunday School today, and even though the projector stopped working half-way through, I just went with the flow (a skill I've really been learning to develop!) and Miranda said it was really good. I only made one funny joke: when the projector started having problems when I was trying to show a video of Nephi and his brothers, I said, "We need more Wi-Fi so we can have more Nephi." I was a bit nervous, but it turned out good overall and a lot of people shared insights. I didn't feel super well today, but I did fast! I also went to a meeting/dinner that was for set-apart ordinance workers at the church building tonight and got to hear a lot of cool things. It was reassuring to be blessed that the Lord would amplify the time I have and sharpen my mind to accomplish everything with school and work as I give up time to serve Him in the temple. I am so excited for the growth that awaits me this semester as I work in the temple.

Much love,
Emily Burnham

Swan Lake and Basketball

20 January - 26 January 2020

Hello my friends! This week was another emotional rollercoaster of me going out of my comfort zone to talk with a guy I think is pretty cute (when old me would just ignore him because things are simpler that way, haha). I'm trying to work on being friends with guys that I see potential for a relationship with, and it is literally the worst. The Lord knows I have a whole lot of growing to do in this area, but at least He is by my side to help me through it. I'm grateful for the encouraging friends I have in my life. And for the Spirit to help me recognize when the discouraging thoughts I am having about myself are coming from Satan, not God.

Monday
No school today! I babysat for the Nixon family for about four hours. The kids are super cute and fun. I stayed a bit longer to pick up the place then went home to work on homework.

Tuesday
Institute was good. I kind of don't like going, but I know it's the right thing to do. But I actually learned some new insights and later in the week would connect things we'd talked about to my personal scripture study of the Book of Mormon. One cool thing we discussed was how different Moroni and Joseph were. One was a sober child, the other jovial in nature, and yet the Lord put them together to learn and grow from each other.

Wednesday
I had an appointment with Dr. Hershey today, and my dairy allergy cure did not hold. We found out that my lactase aren't working. I also tested allergic for peanuts and soy, so he treated those. And apparently some type of lettuce also irritates my body, but I'm not sure which specifically. Honestly though, I felt so invigorated after because I feel like I have more control over my allergies by simply knowing what is wrong with me, knowing exactly what will cause discomfort or pain when I eat it. It was a glorious day.

Thursday
I held office hours today for my TA job. Nothing too exciting. Oh, but that evening I went and saw Swan Lake! I'd never seen a ballet performance live. One of the girls from our ward was in it and we went to support her. She did amazing! Wow, they are so flexible!

Friday
I had a spontaneous job interview with Erin for a new position opening up to be a BYU Online peer mentor! I really could use the extra money. I also spent time coding videos today in the Taylor building and got ticketed... yikes. I don't have a permit to park there (you don't need one after 4pm). I've had so many financial expenses this month and really feel that God is teaching me a lesson. I'm learning to roll with the punches. We won our intermural basketball game... by default because only three girls from the other team showed up. We just decided to do a scrimmage, so for the first half, I played with my team in blue, and for the second half, I was switched over to the white team.

Saturday

I went to the temple and also filmed Whitney's video about the power of the Book of Mormon. That evening, I got invited over to someone in the ward's apartment for dinner. There was a large group of us getting together to feed the missionaries. And when I arrived, guess what I discovered? One of the sister missionaries was Sister Speelman! She taught me in the MTC last semester! Now she's out in the field serving in my area! It was so cool to chat and catch up.

Sunday

Busy as always! Come, Follow Me had a great turnout today! The Burton boys came, as well as a new guy in the ward, Scott. I hope people like it and keep coming! But it was good. Then we had reconnect. Afterwards, Whitney helped me with a film for my YouTube channel (it's gonna be great; can't wait for y'all to see it). Then I worked on some paintings, went to ward prayer, ward choir, a game night, met up with the sister missionaries to give them some cut-outs to teach the first two lessons, then went home to Katie's surprise birthday party! So crazy busy.

This is what I have learned recently: just when life is becoming comfortable and you think you're on top, God likes to pull the carpet out from under your feet. There are always new areas we need growth in, and it's always uncomfortable. I feel a bit like a fish out of water juggling these new challenges and insecurities I'm facing, but I am also confident that the Lord can help me through.

Much love,

Emily Burnham

Stickers, Shin-dig, and Stomach Ache

13 January - 19 January 2020

I sure do love using alliteration in my titles! This was a good week. I'm better adjusted to my new schedule than last week, so it was slightly less overwhelming. I had many tender mercies, probably a lot that I don't even recognize. The Lord truly is blessing me, and I am so happy. I also have moments of doubt, weakness, and discouragement. But I am continually studying the scriptures and finding joy as I focus on my Savior, Jesus Christ.

Monday
I held office hours and did some grading before I had to leave to go to my 4pm class in the Taylor building. We will only be meeting about once a month and coding videos for validation. We had FHE that evening, where we played some games at another apartment.

Tuesday
I loved my ice skating class today! We worked on edge work, and I did so much better. During our practice session together, Cole decided he wanted to cover his face in stickers... haha. At least he gave me one as well, so I think that means we're friends (despite him not smiling, haha).

Wednesday
It was good to hear from my parents today. The other highlight of my day was that a cute boy said hi to me, so that's kind of funny. I went in early to attend a TA review for my Behavioral Neurobiology course, which was not very helpful because it was so fast and nothing stuck in my brain. But it was okay. I also picked up a camera so I can do some filming tomorrow! I'm hoping to find more people with diverse experiences to help reach a wider range of people. We had our first basketball intramural game tonight. My team is actually really good! We won the game 49 to 23 points (I made 6 points). I was so riled up afterwards that I had a hard time getting to sleep, though, since the game started at 9:15 and went for an hour!

Thursday
Yikes, my Behavioral Neurobiology class is hard! I promise I did study for the quiz (I even went to the TA review) but my brain was just not soaking up the information. I met up with Eli, a guy I knew from the MTC, to film him talking about his experience teaching new missionaries. He gave some awesome advice, and he also bore his testimony in Japanese for me! The readings today for my Marriage Enhancement class were super interesting today. Our individual characteristics can be helpful for marriage or hinder a healthy marriage. After my class, I drove over to a new family to babysit. The mom was super pretty and she had five kids! The youngest was already put down. The others were so excited to meet someone new that they did not want to go to bed. We had some fun though!

Friday
In case you wondered what I spent three hours of my life on this afternoon, I included a picture of what coding in the Taylor Building lab looks like... It's super fascinating to watch a bunch of different couples in therapy, to see how the therapist interacts with them. I am most amazed by how little is covered in each session, because talking takes up time! There is always a lot to be said about one little topic. Change takes time. It's not easy. That evening, I went to Whitney's shin-dig. She invited loads of people from the ward. I talked with a few people. Jake Danneman came, so it was fun to be able to talk with him.

Saturday
I babysat for Julia for three hours today. I had a fun time with her two little boys, though they sure wore me out! We did some water-color painting and played with a lot of puzzles. Little Jack sneezed right into my face/hair. It's a good thing he is super adorable ;). That evening, I did some homework and readings, but had to give up after a while because my stomach hurt SO SO bad after dinner. I laid in my bed from 6:30 to 9pm, breathing through the pain as I tried to be productive, curled up on my bed in my dark room. Eventually, I just went to sleep.

Sunday
I truly have been getting a lot of positive feedback about my YouTube channel that I started, so I shouldn't feel so depressed and discouraged. Just like Nephi, I want to tell myself to no longer droop in sin and sorrow, but to rise up and remember the goodness of God. Because truly, I am so so blessed. Despite my stomach being in pain, I enjoyed church and endured through the last bit of second hour. We had a great discussion in Come, Follow Me. We went to Reconnect and I gave the spiritual thought at the end. It was good! A really good day, even though I felt awful :) Honestly, after recapping my day to my roommate, she was shocked. She said she was so sorry I'd had such a terrible and emotionally exhausting day. But I'm alright. Truly, all things are made right through the Savior Jesus Christ. If not in the moment, then later. It just takes some hope and patience as you let the Lord reveal His work in His timing.

Much love,
Emily Burnham